Episode Report Card Dan Kawa: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT I Can See How Ugly She'll Be When She's Old (The Psychic's Lament)
By Dan Kawa | Season 1 | Episode 10 | Aired on 11.30.2004
The campfire. Charlie drapes a blanket around Claire and tells her that if she wants to sleep, he'll stay by her. "I won't leave you, Claire," he says, and of course, in Claire's flashback, .... . .-. / -... --- -.-- ..-. .-. .. . -. -.. / .-.. . .- ...- . ... / .... . .-.! The details are relatively unimportant: she's like five months pregnant and putting up drapes, Thomas Kinkade's a weenie, Claire points out he was the one who said they could handle it, he accuses her of getting pregnant on purpose. I'll just say that she handles the argument very well and he says all the same things that a total asshat would say in this situation. This is a good (and awful) scene.Midsection Beach. Hugo approaches Locke, who appears to be tanning a hide. "Is this about your census?" Locke asks, and adds, "Who's checking on you?" When Hugo looks nonplussed, Locke says, "It was a joke." "Oh," Hugo says. "[expertly timed comic pause] Good one." Locke, who is so yucky that out of the other ten thousand possible containers scattered around the beach, he chooses a dead child's shoe to pour sand onto the hide he's tanning, tells him he lived in Tustin, California, and that he went to Australia "looking for something." "Right on," Hugo says, writing that down. "Didja find it?" Locke looks up at the sky and replies, "It found me." Hugo quickly waylays a nearby castaway, telling her, "I know I already talked to you, but I just wanted to get away from him for a second." Ha!
Kate, Jack, and Charlie are walking along the beach. Jack doesn't think anyone actually attacked Claire; Charlie's angry because he thinks Jack's accusing Claire of making it up. Jack explains that pregnant women have very lucid anxiety nightmares, but that only makes Charlie angrier, until -- just like when she broke up a fistfight with a reprimand -- Kate once again demonstrates the kind of authority you'd think would require more than a cute upturned nose to acquire, getting Charlie to shut up with a single word. Jack tells them that Claire's due in a week, but that any more panicky moments could trigger an early labor, and that out here on an island, that "would not be good." Now, I'm no jinocologist, as Alfred Kinsey would say, but it seems to me that the delivery of Claire's baby is going to be difficult here on an island whether it happens on her exact due date or a week earlier. I mean, we're not talking about Claire delivering a Cabbage Patch preemie, here. It's a week, Doc.