Episode Report Card Sara M: D+ | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Keep Trying
By Sara M | Season 3 | Episode 22 | Aired on 04.19.2006
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.The kids go off visiting their colleges for pre-frosh weekend, which fortunately happens at the same time on all college campuses. Seth somehow sneaks into Brown's weekend even though he wasn't accepted there. And after this episode, he still isn't, despite getting a meeting with the some important Brown guy, and really, really wanting to. All is not lost though, because Seth gets to spend time with Anna, back after two years and ready to go to Brown herself. Ryan gets his own blast from the past when Kirsten spots Theresa in an airport -- with her son! Kirsten tells Ryan, and he comes rocketing back from Berkeley to track Theresa down and ask her about it. We find out that the baby isn't Ryan's and that Theresa has somehow managed to become a successful executive, despite not having gone to college or possibly even finishing high school. Marissa makes a magical transformation back into an upright citizen, but goes back to Volchok after not feeling comfortable at Berkeley and seeing that he rented The Sound of Music to know more about her, which was really sweet of him. Sandy and Kirsten keep fighting, ending in Kirsten leaving a hospital dinner after telling the table that she ended up marrying her father. She takes a glass of wine out with her, and drinks the whole thing down in one big shameful gulp. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Well, here we are at the twenty-second episode of the season, which means that it's the season finale! I'm really looking forward to my summer vacation from this show and...wait, what's that you say? The O.C. is doing twenty-five episodes this season? But...why? Shouldn't shows that suck have as few opportunities as possible to be seen? Goddammit.
Ryan and Seth show off the bags they've packed for their college pre-frosh weekend trips. Seth is surprised at the large size of Ryan's package (hee hee), since Ryan only owns "a wifebeater and two hoodies." And yet, all he ever seems to wear these days are those button-down shirts that it's completely unrealistic for a high-school student who's supposed to be from the wrong side of tracks to wear. Ryan says that he packed everything because he didn't know what a prospective college student is supposed to dress like. I imagine that they dress like everyone else does, Ryan. There's no secret clothing code there. Seth says that he's packing light, seeing as the pre-frosh weekend he's attending is one that he isn't even invited to. This is all a part of Ryan and Seth's master plan to get Seth into Brown and Summer's heart. Unfortunately, this is also the only part of their plan. After Seth gets on the campus, they've got nothing. Kirsten breezes into the kitchen, ready to drop the kids off at the airport and get all weepy that they will soon be leaving home for good. Sandy, of course, is too busy being an Evil Businessman to care about his sons' college plans, and will not be accompanying them to the airport.
At the airport, there's an awkward moment where Ryan and Seth avoid hugging each other goodbye, and then Seth is off to his gate. This gives Kirsten and Ryan some time to talk. Ryan admits to being nervous about going to college, and Kirsten gives him a pep talk to the effect that if he can "conquer" Newport, he'll be fine at Berkeley. Maybe he'll only get himself arrested, like, four times there and limit his physical altercations to one a week. That would be a nice improvement. They hug, and Ryan is off to his gate.
Once Ryan's gone, Kirsten turns to see a familiar face coming down some stairs. It's Theresa...and a woman holding what appears to be Theresa's son. You know, the one she told Ryan she miscarried. That baby. Kirsten is so surprised that she doesn't even tilt her head or anything! I guess she, like the rest of us, just assumed that Theresa was still in Atlanta.
Over at the Roberts Mansion, our heroines are having similar college weekend issues. Summer worries that her sparkly scarves won't fit in with the wardrobe of her future classmates. Because smart people, you see, don't like to wear anything that shimmers. Marissa tells her to calm down and just be herself, adding that it might be for the best that they're single now, because they'll be able to "focus on the future." Way to sound like my guidance counselor, there, Marissa. Reach for your goals, live for your dreams. Anything is possible. You can achieve. Hang in there! Marissa even gives Summer a playful punch on the shoulder to show just how excited she is about college, which is a complete turnaround from her attitude just last week when she was skipping school to party with date rapists. When Summer points this out, Marissa answers that she "was going through something." Yeah, well, when are you not going through something, Marissa? And how is it that everyone else seems to be able to handle their emotional baggage in at least a semi-productive manner while you can't stub your toe without ODing or hassling deck chairs or dating really hot guys? Learn. To. Deal. Marissa says that she's done with Volchok and won't be seeing him again "after today." You see, she's on her way to his giant warehouse apartment to pick up some of her stuff and end things. Summer doesn't think that's wise; goodbyes always lead to goodbye sex, which in turn leads to a continued and even more unhealthy relationship. "Have you no faith in me at all?" Marissa asks, and even she doesn't believe what she's saying anymore. "Forty-eight hours ago, you were Newport's answer to Courtney Love," Summer responds. Liar! Courtney Love had talent. Marissa agrees to meet Volchok at a neutral, bed-free location. Summer agrees to wear her sparkly scarf to Brown.