Episode Report Card Kim: C+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Miss Conception
By Kim | Season 4 | Episode 4 | Aired on 10.30.2001
Previously on Felicity: Felicity told her father that she would pay for college herself. Javier thought that Felicity should enter a beauty pageant, and use the prize money to pay for school. Meghan's father said that if Meghan doesn't annul her marriage to Sean, she'll be cut off, but Meghan hasn't told Sean about this. Felicity cheated on Ben, with Noel, and Ben doesn't know. I just realized that a lot of this season is about people keeping secrets from their significant other. Bad idea. They always find out.
Some space-age lounge music plays as Felicity examines the outside of a home pregnancy test in the bathroom of her apartment. Javier calls in to ask what she's doing; Felicity says she's getting dressed, hides the test, and walks out in her really ugly bathing suit to face Javier The only word I can think of to describe it would be "functional." But it's not even that, really, because it has a bandeau top, which would totally fall down while you were swimming. Javier takes one look at it and rejects it because "this is a beauty pageant, not the Olympic trials." He urges Felicity to try on "the stringy number." Elena walks in and asks what's going on. Javier starts to fill her in, but Felicity warns him to be quiet. Javier is quiet for about two seconds, and then tells Elena that Felicity is entering a beauty pageant. When Felicity gives him a look, Javier points out that she would have told Elena eventually anyway. What happened to his lips being like two glue sticks? Felicity explains about the scholarship money. Elena laughs. Felicity asks whether her bathing suit is okay. Elena suggests that she look for something a little more...and Javier supplies, "Stringy?" Elena agrees. Javier looks at Felicity and says, "Stringy!" with a look on his face like, "Oh, what a shocker that Elena suggested the same thing that I did!" Felicity resignedly promises to look for something else and walks back into the bathroom.
Have I mentioned lately how much I love the credits for this show? I love the credits for this show.
Tracy Scoggins lectures to the beauty pageant contestants, suggesting that they practice their group dance number at home. Remember Tracy Scoggins? I think she was on, like, Dynasty or Dallas or one of those shows. But she really does look like an aging beauty queen, so that was good casting. She's very Maria Shriver-esque, but not quite so pointy, and minus the scary Republican husband and Kennedy connection. Felicity listens to the lecture, which includes lots of mandatory activities, and looks overwhelmed.