Episode Report Card Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT RevCam's Secret Past
By Sara M | Season 8 | Episode 11 | Aired on 12.29.2003
RevCam runs up to his computer, where the "File Transfer Log" is still on the screen. RevCam sits back and chews on his fingers.
It's nighttime in Paul's houseboat, and he's asleep. Suddenly, a huge gun barrel enters the frame, pointed at Paul's face. "Wake up, sleepyhead," singsongs RevCam. Paul wakes up, notices the gun, and inhales sharply. He does not scream, which is what I would have done. RevCam says he just wants to meet the man who stole his wife. Paul gets all indignant and says that he did not steal Sally -- RevCam lost her. This is probably not the right time to argue over semantics, Paul. RevCam asks Paul if he wants to "go play on the computer."
Paul gets shoved into his computer chair with the biggest gun barrel ever still pointed at his face. Hey, how does RevCam keep getting all these unregistered guns, anyway? Does he have, like, a barrel of them back at home? RevCam finds some pictures on Paul's printer of Sally and Paul having sex clandestinely so as not to cause any trouble with the television censors. Paul pulls the "Cheater's File" up on his computer. RevCam says that the first time he saw the pictures of his wife with Paul, he was kind of mad, but then it let him see Sally as a different woman, and he had awesome sex with her. So thanks, Paul, says RevCam, and also, delete the file. Paul does so, but a noise distracts RevCam and allows Paul to attack him. They wrestle around for a while, with RevCam getting a good kick in to Paul's crotch, then wind up on the floor. RevCam is on top of Paul and they're fighting over the gun barrel and where to point it. The gun fires, and we see a splatter of blood fly onto RevCam's flashlight. RevCam and Paul both lie there, panting, so it's difficult to figure out which one of them actually got shot.
But the next scene clears that right up, as RevCam is throwing a Paul-shaped bundle overboard. The bundle hits the water and floats. Maybe RevCam should have considered putting a weight or two in that bundle. RevCam rips up the printed sex pictures and throws them into the water. They float too. I don't think RevCam really thought this through enough. Neither did the writer of this movie, who just spent all that time and all those scenes establishing the character of Paul and his search for what happened to Sally, only to have him die without being at all effective.
Back at the Mansion, Felicity is snoozing in RevCam's bed. "Wake up, sleepyhead," RevCam says, running a finger down her cheek. Oh, see, it's like what he did to Paul, except different. I'm not quite sure what the symbolism is, but I'm sure it's there. RevCam gives her the diamond necklace she was trying on before and says that this is his way of saying he loves her. Jan Hammer pushes the "ominous twinkly music" button. Oh, no, now RevCam and Felicity are kissing. And he's unbuttoning her shirt and running his finger down her chest. Please stop, RevCam. Thankfully, the camera pans away from them to The Most Awkwardly Posed Family Portrait Ever, thus sparing me from having to see any more. I do have to hear the kissing sounds, though, and this is one time that I wish Jan Hammer's music was as loud and overbearing as it was in every other scene.
It's the next morning. RevCam is standing on a sand dune by the beach. A dog runs away from a tiny beach house, and its owner runs after it. RevCam watches. The scene ends. I think the dog's owner was supposed to be Clair (wearing a sensible sweat suit), but I couldn't really see her face and she was only shown for a few seconds anyway. I'm not sure what that scene was about. Is RevCam so evil that he makes dogs run away from their owners?
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