Episode Report Card Potes: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Bald Fuggle
By Potes | Season 6 | Episode 1 | Aired on 03.07.2006
In her second "My Life as a Cover Girl," we see Nicole do a Cover Girl shoot with another model. She loves Tru Blend powder foundation. It does seem that, at the very least, she's doing better than Naima.
We are led into judging by a photo of bald Tyra. The hair people on that shoot, of course, were glad that they could just let Tyra be in her natural state. The girls enter to very solemn music. Tyra reveals the prizes: a modeling contract with Ford, a spread in Elle Magazine by Gilles Bensimon, and a $100,000 contract with Cover Girl. Same old stuff. Also the same old stuff are the judges: Nigel, J. Alexander, and Twiggy. Nigel is pervy, J. is annoying, and Twiggy is peppy and British.
Sara is first for review. Everyone oohs and aahs over her photo, and Twiggy says that she looks like a divine creature from another planet. Tyra makes more of the fact that they found Sara at a mall, and says that, in her opinion, it's one of the best photos in Top Model history. I don't actually see the greatness.
Then Danielle, who says she was nervous because she has dents in her head from getting it pressed when she was younger. I don't know if Danielle understands that she still actually has hair. She's all, "I'm the bald and the beautiful!" However, intelligence has no correlation with beauty, and the photo is slammin'. It's much better than Sara's. Tyra tells Danielle to watch her face angles, because she has a big-ass nostrily nose. Someone might have mentioned that to Pigford.
Jade's picture is striking, but not particularly magical. Tyra tells her to watch her bone structure, because she gets a little dragalicious. Her cheekbones are really something else. Miss J. mimics her face, and it's mean but funny. Tyra brings up Jade's arrogance at the press panel. Jade says that's not true, but even in this episode, there is plenty of arrogance to flash back to. And speaking of flashbacks, Jade says that she's very humble and down to earth. I think they cast Jade just to make Yaya look better. Nigel tells Jade that part of being humble is listening, but Jade talks over him and says that she's humble inside. Nigel says that being humble means not talking over the judges, and Jade finally gets it. She is truly the worst.
Next is Joanie. Twiggy is impressed by her eyes, and Tyra and Nigel are both surprised by how beautiful it was. Joanie is happy, but I think the subtext is that she's kind of ugly in person. She looks super-jowly in the photo. But I have a strong jaw and would look hella ugly bald, so I grudgingly give Joanie a wet million-dollar bill for her performance.