Episode Report Card Pamie: D | 16 USERS: B+ YOU GRADE IT Pilot
By Pamie | Season 1 | Episode 1 | Aired on 10.04.2000
Saint Clare and I do two shots of kamikazes.
Looking through the opening credits also tells me that Gilmore Girls might be the most ethnically diverse cast in WB history. This probably seals its untimely fate.
Pan up to the exterior of an inn. Lorelai walks through the lobby and hands a bellman something. As she's walking by, I see Alex Borstein's name flash on the screen. I'm weakening, here. Now, you may know Alex as Mad TV's Mrs. Swan, but I still know her as the very nice girl that comes to all of my comedy troupe's festivals and hangs out with us and is a good friend. See? This was never discussed before. How am I supposed to recap a friend? Man! The Reservations manager (who I'll save you time in telling you that his name is Michel Gerard (can I get a normal spelling around here, please?)) is on the phone telling a customer that they are completely booked. He says that there is a wedding party in the hotel that weekend and that the customer will have to pick another weekend. He says he's sure. He's positive. He doesn't have to look, he just knows. He tells her that if it will make her happy, he'll look. He puts the phone down for three seconds, picks it back up and says, "No, I am sorry. We are all booked." Hee. Reservation Manager humor.
"Oh no, don't move. Just ignore the tiny woman pushing around the two-hundred pound instrument." It's Alex. She's pushing a harp through the crowded lobby. "Ah, that's it, Lady. Tie your shoe NOW!" The bent-over lady moves out of Alex's way. Lorelai walks over to Alex. Lorelai stops her and says she was just wondering if she could be "nicer" to the guests. "I'm sorry. Did you not want a harp player?" Alex asks. Lorelai: "Yes, I did." Alex: "And, did you not want a great harp player?" Lorelai: "Yes, I did." Alex: "Okay. I am a great harp player. And this is my great harp. 'Kay? So if you're looking for someone to be [insert finger quotes here] nice [end finger quoting] to the guests, get a harmonica player. 'Kay? Or maybe some guy who whistles through his nose. Capisce?" She pushes Lorelai out of the way with her harp, and continues to complain about the lobby. She compliments the architect on his lovely placement of giant tables in the middle of rooms.
Back in Reservation Wacky, Michel is still on the phone with the woman, telling her that he can't possibly do anything for her unless she picks another weekend. The only way that he could get her a room is if he built one himself and he's "not a man who works with his hands." He asks her to pick another weekend. Any other weekend. She picks another weekend. He looks it up. It's booked. Wah-wah-wah-waaaaah. Lorelai asks whether the plumber has been to room 4 yet. Michel says that the plumber "was here, he did nothing, it's two hundred dollars." He hands her the phone. She calls the plumber and sweet-talks him into not charging her for the lack of maintenance. She kisses Rory hello. Michel asks what Lorelai what "[her] offspring is doing." "I need stamps. Can I take these?" "Nooooo," Michel sings. "Take them," Lorelai says, exerting her authority. She points at Rory's cable-knit sweater and asks, "What's with the muumuu?" Rory and Lorelai exchange more fashion banter until Rory turns to leave. Lorelai tells Rory to let Michel (pronounced "Michelle," the French way) look at her French paper before she leaves. "Excuse me?" he asks, while sorting reservation cards. "That'd be great!" Rory says. "No," Michel says Frenchly. Lorelai batters him by speaking in a terrible French accent until he says he'll look at it if he gets a chance. Rory gives him a few orders to make her mother proud and then walks away. Lorelai stares at the working Michel for a few seconds until he says, "I despise you," but he says it in that cute French questioning way, so Lorelai smiles.