Episode Report Card Gustave: D+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Simon, Portrait of a Teenage Prostitute
By Gustave | Season 7 | Episode 2 | Aired on 09.22.2002
Upstairs, Robbie tells Lucy that he's still in love with Mary. Lucy tells Robbie that while Mary might not be in love with Captain Smith, she's still in love with Ben and only dating Captain Smith to get back at Ben. Oh please, like there's no other reason to fuck Grant Goodeve than to get back at someone. Lucy tells Robbie not to tell Mary about his love for her. She leaves to go check on Ruthie and Kevin. Robbie picks up the phone and calls Mary anyway. He gets her machine. "Hey, remember when you were trying to get me back last year?" he says. The machine hangs up on him.
Back down in the CamKitchen, Simon, Annie and RevCam are rehashing the whole male prostitution storyline some more. "You mean to tell me that everyone told you to stop and you just kept on making dates?" asks RevCam. "I'm not the only one who doesn't listen," says Simon, referring to everyone talking to Mary about Captain Smith despite Annie's orders not to.
Back upstairs, Lucy bitches out Kevin for encouraging Robbie to get back together with Mary. Kevin defends himself by pointing out that Ben is getting tired of Mary's ambivalence, and is put off by the fact that she's been sucking on that leathery dad-sicle all summer. The doorbell rings. Kevin runs to answer it. D'oh! It's Ben! The CamRents come to the door to see who it is. "Is Mary home?" asks Ben. Sensitive synthesizer music plays as RevCam reveals that Mary isn't home and might not be coming home anytime soon.
After the Cam-mercial break, Ben is eating a man-sized sandwich in the kitchen with Kevin and explaining that he's shipped all his things and transferred to Glenoak to be with Mary. Kevin encourages Ben to go back to Buffalo before it's too late. "To tell you the truth," says Kevin, "I don't know what I'm doing here either." He explains that he's madly in love with Lucy, but she doesn't feel the same way. "Don't give up so easily," advises Ben. "It may be too late for me but Lucy's right upstairs." And she's not dating a middle-aged man, either! ["…Yet." -- Sars]
Upstairs, Lucy is trying to get Ruthie to go downstairs and eavesdrop on Kevin and Ben. Ruthie refuses to eavesdrop ever again. She likes Kevin, because he's a "serious dude who treats me like a grown-up." Ruthie and Lucy discuss the definition of "growing up" and how it relates to "showing other people consideration." Kevin knocks at the bedroom door. Ruthie excuses herself to go down and say hello to Ben. "I think that would be the considerate thing to do!" she says snarkily. Whatever. Kevin and Lucy talk things over and decide to take things slowly, because Lucy isn't ready to get serious. Kevin says he'll wait until she's ready.