Episode Report Card Jeff Long: A | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT HELLO, Read a Magazine! Fashion's Changing
By Jeff Long | Season 8 | Episode 14 | Aired on 10.28.2010
The next morning, at 3 AM, they all rise. Andy says that this is fucking exciting. Gretchen tells Mondo that he looks like a million bucks. In the car to Lincoln Center, Gretchen says that she gets weepy when she thinks of what's happening. Wow, I have to commend them for being super present as all of this is taking place.
They walk inside the tent. Wait. Gretchen is wearing what appears to be black panties under a see-through black dress. April made her outfit. I don't get her. Anyway, they are amazed as the size of the tent. They all hug and feel the moment a little more. Gretchen lies down and makes runway angels.
Backstage, everything gets underway. Mondo still hasn't tracked down all of his models with only 90 minutes before the show to begin. Also, he wants to change the line-up of his show. Gretchen is worried about him. Everyone is arriving! Tim asks him if he's alright and suggests that he oversee the styling of his models instead of sticking strictly with the line-up. Andy is still sewing! There's Anthony from last season! Mondo pulls in an alternate model, but she doesn't have long hair. Peter Butler tells him everything will be fine. Tim tells Andy that he has to make decisions immediately.
Onstage, Oh God, Jessica Simpson is a guest judge and, I'm sorry, but that dress she's wearing is WRONG. So unflattering. It's this shroud thing and, I don't know maybe she's picked up a few pounds, but I'm going to give her the benefit of the doubt and just assume her daddy-approved enormous knockers are making her look like she has no waist. No, Jessica. Did you actually know ahead of time that you would be doing this? And, it hits her and the wrongest place on her thighs. She looks like a spotter on a cheerleading squad wearing a sequined Chinese star.
Heidi comes onstage to begin the show. She tells the audience that she has never gotten as attached to the designers as she did this season. She introduces the judges, including Jessica, who is apparently an actress. Gretchen is first. She's still naked. She's choked up immediately and says that she's glad her mom is here. Her theme is "running through thunder."
Her first look is shorts with a little top and a short blazer. It's all those melty Gretchen earth tones. Please don't make me try to describe these colors. The shorts fit like a freaking glove and are oddly sexy and maybe (?) just a little demure. You couldn't have an ounce of fat on your whole waist to knee area, but if you didn't and wanted to wear these, you probably wouldn't look like a total whore. Which is something. Already, I'm feeling that she has amped up the styling. The hair is really mature and sexy and sophisticated. Go hat head. She's paired it with some Navajo necklace that doesn't look as crunchy as it could. The blazer has a popped collar too, which works well with the hip hair.