Episode Report Card Alex Richmond: D+ | 2 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Gimme A Break! I Sure Deserve It!
By Alex Richmond | Season 5 | Episode 8 | Aired on 01.06.2002
Ally relays her current dilemma to her shrink: should she tell Jenny that Jackie's fiancé made a play for her? El Shrinkador says she should. Ally looks way uncomfortable with that. Then, the shrink changes his answer to maybe. Ally feels better with that, and makes to leave. The little boy is back in the waiting room. He asks, "Why don't you believe?" Wuh? says Ally. "I need air," says the boy. I need a drink. Is this supposed to be Ally's inner child? Or the baby grown up? Who or what needs air? DEK's tired brain, perhaps?
The promos for the impending arrival of Jon Bon Jovi? Are not that interesting. Are we supposed to believe that he's a bad boy, and not just another wrinkly has-been rocker from Jersey? Maybe if they had hired Sebastian Bach, I'd be happier. Or Ozzy. Ozzy would have been great. And yes, I know Ozzy isn't from Jersey. And that Sebastian is really from Canada. But he lives in Jersey now! And Ozzy just rules.
Ally's asking Glenn what she should do about the Jenny/Jackie/younger snake predicament. How many people will she ask before doing something? How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Glenn says she should tell, because what if she's right? Jenny pops up: "Right about what?" Oop. Ally says that Young Snake "kind of made a pass. With a look. He wasn't direct." What if Ally's wrong? What if Ally's right? What to do? Jenny asks that Ally offer herself up as bait. Ally asks if she's just to walk up and say, "Hi, sailor." Yes. Why not? Maybe dance with him in the bar? While Richard is throwing himself at Jackie Bisset? Ally says she can't. Jenny says, "Please?" Because it's her mom. Because while "hi, sailor" is ludicrous, Jenny saying "please"? Is just what it takes.
Nell Carter's on the stand, taking no guff and putting up with no nonsense. Crap? She won't take it. You know what I'm talking about. She says that if the court thinks Kimmy Bishop is disgruntled, the court should see the men Nell Carter fixed up with Kimmy. Nell Carter leans into the mike to repeat their comments: "Never. Again." Hee. And, look at all the people she has fixed up successfully! The court is jammed with happy, loving couples, being all snuggly and nuzzly. Barf. Nell Carter says she saw Kimmy as a challenge, and that even though she is a woman who "responds to challenge," she had to cut Kimmy loose.
Ally is still in the Uni, still unsure about what to do about Jackie Bisset and her fiancé. Richard thinks that Ally should tell Jackie her boy's a player, and send her into Richard's arms. As Ally turns into the mirror, sighing, she sees the little boy behind her. Another fucking hallucination.