Episode Report Card Omar G: C | 4 USERS: C YOU GRADE IT Head Of The Glass
By Omar G | Season 5 | Episode 18 | Aired on 04.12.2006
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.A little girl has the amazing ability to break glass all around her. I thought all kids with baseball bats had that. In any case, the child, who's living in a foster home, gets angry and kills her foster parent...or so we think, until we find out that her missing father, Glasshole, also has the Krypto-ability, and that he's actually the one carrying out misdeeds to support his diamond-stealing habit. MamaKent, a friend of the foster mom, takes in the girl, and Clark befriends her by acting like Superdork, but it's kind of sweet, so we'll forgive him. Clark tracks down Glasshole, and there's a glass vs. glass showdown in which the little girl must decide not to kill her own father, lest she become Glasshole II: More Glasshole. The girl ends up going to live with her grandmother, who is thrilled to have a kid around who can break all her precious mementos just by thinking about it. Meanwhile, Lex and Lana hang out together in the name of spaceship research, and Chloe doesn't like it one bit. She confronts him, and Lex says some very mean things about Chloe's perpetually single status. The confrontation gets back to Lana, who gets mad at Chloe for implying that something's going on between her and Lex. Lana goes to Stately Luthor Manor to make it clear that there's nothing romantic going on, but then all of a sudden they start kissing like they mean it. God help us: it's the real Lexana. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
"Tonight's Smallville features the directorial debut of Tom Welling," says Voice-Over Man, as clips of tonight's episode appear. We like you, Tom, but try not to screw it up, all right?
A young girl is pouring water from a clear glass pitcher. We hear a woman, presumably her mother, on the phone with MamaKent, telling her that she finished work on the charts for her committee meeting. "Oh, Clark's in the neighborhood? Sure, he can come pick them up," she tells MamaKent, as she balances a phone on her shoulder and serves two plates of dinner on the table. The little girl, in pigtails, doesn't look too happy about much of anything. Chicken and sides? Fuck this shit. Where's my Happy Meal?
The woman finishes her conversation with MamaKent, as the little girl pushes her dinner plate away, maybe a fraction of a millimeter, and goes to another table in the kitchen/dining area to sulk. The girl intently stares at a piece of paper she's scribbling on. In the background, Mom tells the girl to come have dinner; she can draw later. Mom tells Maddie (whom we'll call "Shardy"), that the rules dictate that they have dinner at the table as a family. Shardy keeps drawing. Mom sighs. Mom gets annoyed, and tells Shardy that she may not want to talk, but that she'd better listen. They struggle with the girl's sketchbook. As they do, the glass pitcher behind them vibrates. It suddenly breaks. Mom turns around in surprise. She asks what happened. Shardy looks scared. We hear water dribbling. "You did that, didn't you?" Mom asks. She suddenly has figured out that all the times she found broken glass around the house weren't accidents. But they were happy accidents! Suddenly, sounding not-so-Mom-like, the woman says, "Nobody warned me about this. I think you need help." The glass of a small frame holding a photo of the two of them breaks nearby. The woman gasps, and says she's calling the foster care agency right now, and that she can't take it anymore. Shardy goes to her, and tries to touch her arm, but Foster Mom spins and snaps, "Don't touch me!"
Mom tells Shardy to go to her room. Shardy does, angrily. The whole house seems to rumble, especially a small stained-glass window Shardy passes on her way upstairs. Shardy cups her hands to both sides of her head. A stained-glass window in the kitchen explodes. Shardy, scared, crawls under her bed. Foster Mom watches, in horror, as all the windows in the kitchen area suddenly explode in slow motion. She screams. Light fixtures, windows, a big aquarium. It all breaks. We cut between Foster Mom screaming and Shardy under the bed, looking like she's controlling the whole thing. This is why we aren't having kids. Screw this Carrie crap. Under the bed, Shardy has tears in her eyes.
Downstairs, Foster Mom slowly gets up in the darkened kitchen. She breathes heavily as the house continues to rumble. Don't go outside! You might be safer there! Foster Mom does a very stupid thing on a show filled with people doing stupid things weekly -- she goes and stands in front of a very large mirror, staring at her own reflection in horror. Yes, it's terrifying to be so dumb. Under the bed, as scary music plays, Shardy cups her ears. She closes her eyes, hard. "Noooo!" Foster Mom screams, as she waits to be killed, but good. This is an interesting way to commit suicide, I guess. Close-up of Shardy's eyes, darting from side to side, as we hear the mirror downstairs break. Wow, that was a dumb death, but my understanding is that it will thin the idiot herd, so let's not feel too bad.