Episode Report Card Lady Lola: D | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT They Came, They Saw, They Smashed
By Lady Lola | Season 2 | Episode 13 | Aired on 10.21.2010
Once home, Pauly and Vinny both call their ladies to set up dates for their last day in Miami. Half an hour after Vinny's reservation has passed, Ramona calls to tell him that she's "almost ready." Eventually she makes it, and he can't believe that he's actually courting a girl instead of popping bottles and banging girls. They have dinner and contemplate a long-distance relationship, sharing a chaste kiss before ending their night separately. Meanwhile, Pauly walks with his lady Rocio to dinner -- holding hands no less. He actually thinks this one might be girlfriend material, so they share a longer, but equally chaste, kiss on the street before parting ways. Don't hate the player, hate the tame.
Elsewhere, Sammi and Ronnie share their own last night dinner. They banter back and forth with their usual weird, self-conscious (at least on Sammi's part) bullshit. She basically tells him that if he's going to be her boyfriend, they need to be attached at the hip at all times. Way to give it the hard sell, you walking cliché. He compares her to Mr. Hyde and tells her she's acting immature. They leave in strained silence. Back at the house, everyone's ready to go out and waiting for SamRo 2.0 to return. When they arrive, they sit outside and prolong their huff out on the patio. Vinny suggests Snooki tell them everyone's ready, and she gives him a perfect, wordless, horrified shake of the head, like, "Don't drag me into that mess." Finally Vinny breaks up the cold war.
They head over to the appropriately named b.e.d. with dreams of getting it in dancing in their heads. While the guys get their creep on, Sammi and Ronnie resolve their ridiculous non-fight. Snooki hits up the stripper pole, Pauly D finds a chick to mack on, and Vinny finds two girls whose combined ratio of ugliness to sluttiness makes up one semi-attractive girl. Vinny decides that he doesn't want to step out on Ramona. Or as Vinny eloquently put it, "when you have a good girl out there... say no to hos." Sound advice. So Sitch sweeps in before you can say "Chlamydia" and takes those tricks to the bathroom for some down and dirty. It only took three minutes for the switch to happen. Classy gals.
The next day, JWOWW sets about cleaning the refrigerator and finds a Tupperware container full of what could five-week-old manicotti and meatballs, or could also be mummified vomit. I guess we'll never know! Honestly, though, what's more amazing is that she's actually cleaning. It's kind of a refreshing change of pace compared to last season's Real World crew, who were tossing mattresses off of balconies and running around doing everything short of saying, "Let's burn this mother down!" It takes a lot to make the Jersey Shore kids look responsible, is what I'm saying. As expected, she's a little bitter about getting the shit end of the stick and having to clean up her roommates' decaying food. She reasons that she's not fucking them, therefore she shouldn't have to clean up after them. A good rule of thumb, I'd say.