Episode Report Card Potes: B+ | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Lisa Needs Her Diaper Changed
By Potes | Season 5 | Episode 8 | Aired on 11.08.2005
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description! Finished? Click here to close.The girls meet up with Season 3 winner Eva the Diva and are way too excited about it. She gives them some advice and tells them how great their lives will be when they too can travel with an entourage, of which at least one member is their cousin. Everybody is sick of Lisa, who has taken a fancy to dressing like a black Courtney Love. Then the girls actually do each get a mini-entourage, courtesy of Cover Girl, one of whom is used to make a crap-ass poster paper collage that is supposed to impress uber-manager Benny Medina. Yeah, I don't know. Kim does the best job and wins a guest spot on Veronica Mars. They say it's because she conveyed acting talent, but really it's because she fit the rental-car-employee-role wardrobe requirements best. The girls then participate in a photo shoot with MTV's Wildboyz, because nothing says fashion like a tattooed midget. When The Boyz show a preference for Nicole, Lisa pulls out all the stops and comes out in a diaper, in which she proceeds to urinate. All class, that one. And just when you think you're about to bid au revoir to deux bitches, Tyra pulls a truly unconscionable stunt and eliminates NOBODY. I hate that. Want more? The full recap starts right below!
Previously: Lisa loved rolling around in the mud, and not just proverbially, and strangers inexplicably kind of liked her. Kim tried being a lady for the first time with great results, and Kyle was given walking papers (and not of the fierce runway variety). Six girls remain! Bitches, all.
It is night, and the girls return home from their elimination. They find some "Kyle Mail." Awwww. It's not original, but it still makes me miss her. Kim says that reading it might make her cry. The note is double-spaced and in a third-grader's scrawl, with little stars at the top. I still draw little flowers on the envelope when I send mail, so I cast no stones. Kyle tells "all [her] girls" that she loves them and is sad to leave, and wishes them the best of luck. There is more than that, but I'm sure it's something like "I truly hope that the one who is crowned America's Next Top Model will use some of her winnings to finance Lasix surgery for Mr. Bojangles. If not, I will pay for the surgery myself in Reese's Pieces." Kim cries in the confessional and says she knows that Kyle will be okay, but that she's not sure if she'll be okay without Kyle. Way to think of your friend's welfare. We see a few candid shots of Kim and Kyle on the wall, and in at least one, Kim appears to be copping a feel. She says that the house is so lonely for her without Kyle, and that she doesn't think she'll do well without Kyle at all. Yeah, until another one offers up her lesbirginity at the mighty altar of Ms. Gender Ambiguity. We'll see how long it lasts, is all I'm saying.
Meanwhile, Bre tells her mother to pray for her. We get to relive Bre's latest jaunt into the final two, and she says that, in the next five weeks, she's living every day like it's her last in the competition. Her mother tells her to be positive and be the best that she can be -- no more and no less. Bre interviews that she's not going to quit, but rather will take every moment and use it to her advantage. I know she's spunky and all, but I don't quite get while she's still there.
Lisa prints out photos from the girls' digital camera. She says it's not cool how the other girls keep erasing photos of her, so she's printing them out. Wow, that is really kind of sad. Jayla looks on with a lack of concern. Lisa says that, slowly but surely, she's becoming more of a threat to the others, and that since the group has become so small (literally and not in the sense of "petty," although there is that too), people are getting insecure. No, Lisa, they just don't like you. Lisa pins up a photo that she obviously took of herself while holding the camera an arm's length away. It's like the people who do that with their Match.com profiles -- as my girlfriend says, "Don't they at least have ONE friend?"