Episode Report Card Lady Lola: B | Grade It Now! YOU GRADE IT Team Meatballs, Attack!
By Lady Lola | Season 4 | Episode 6 | Aired on 09.08.2011
Ronnie rubs Sitch's back and tells him that he's there for him even after their fight. Then, awesomely their little talk becomes a full-on therapy session. Ronnie says, "It's not all about being tough. Be real. Let it all out." I cynically wonder if the producers encouraged him to take this tack just so they could get footage of The Situation crying. Whether they did or not, Ronnie's anti-Dr. Phil works a charm. Sitch blubbers as he reiterates that he hates not being able to do anything for himself. Then Ronnie ridiculously asks if Sitch wants to go to the gym with the other guys. Sitch laughs at the absurdity of this suggestion and, like a plastic bag dancing in the wind, the moment must end. Ronnie's point is that Sitch would benefit from getting out of the house, but it's just such a nonsense choice to make. Not dinner or a walk in the park or something low-impact. Instead, he suggests Sitch go watch as his pals full-on grunt and strain and pop veins out of their shit. That's Ronnie's idea. No, that won't amplify Sitch's feelings of impotence at all. Also? A little bit HoYay!, no?
In any case, Sitch starts to feel a bit more levity about his plight. He thinks back at his foolishness and has to say it out loud to fully believe it: "I ran into a concrete wall." He later interviews, "No matter how many times you got knocked down, man, it's how many times you get up." Like this was a scenario in which he was "knocked down" and not just a supreme act of idiocy. Whatever it takes to get you through the day, bro. Sitch decides he's going to "man up" and stay. Also? He is desperate for fame, so any actual leaving really makes no sense. If he actually makes good on his threat, that's the end of the drama. Clearly he was never going to actually leave. He chokes up as he thinks Ronnie for hearing him out, especially in contrast to everyone else's seeming apathy. Or, you might say, their wisdom for seeing The Situation as the toolbag he is and letting him stew in his own juices for a little while as they laugh at him from a distance. Sitch goes into the bathroom to take off his neck brace like he's running a damn victory lap. Ronnie breezes through, knocking on a nearby wall, and says, "By the way, this wall's sheet rock." Zing!
Back outside, the girls are rolling their suitcases of laundry around town. Snooki's boobs bounce in her low-cut top as she stumbles over the cobble stones in front of a cathedral. A priest asks, "Can you cover your body, please, when you're walking in front of a church?" Snooki tells him to shut up, calls him an asshole, and keeps walking. I'll repeat that: Snooki just called a priest an asshole. She catches up with the others and tells them what happened. She thinks the people at her church would have complimented her boobalicious outfit and adds for emphasis, "God likes my tits. He made my tits." JWOWW snarks, "God didn't make mine."