Episode Report Card Aaron: A | 1 USERS: A+ YOU GRADE IT Dead End
By Aaron | Season 2 | Episode 13 | Aired on 06.01.2002
International House of Mancakes. David comes home and finds the place empty. He sits down to read the newspaper in the living room, but almost immediately begins bawling uncontrollably. He's forced to stop when Keith returns, but he doesn't do a very good job of covering it up, especially when he tries to wipe away the snot with his sleeve. Keith explains that he was out getting something to eat, which makes David sad, because he was planning to cook for them. "I was going to make a poached Chilean sea bass and polenta," he explains. "And a wild mushroom cassoulet." Mmm. Now I'm hungry. But didn't David watch last season? Chilean Sea Bass is like the official Six Feet Under meal of break-ups. That certainly doesn't bode well for their relationship. Of course, neither does Keith's incredibly rude attitude throughout this scene, so I guess these two have bigger problems than mere menu selection. That's demonstrated even further when David tries to ask if Keith has made any progress in his job search. "I don't need to pay someone to tell me I can get a job in security," answers Keith, but it's clear he's not too thrilled by the prospect. "What's wrong with security?" inquires David. "It's a national obsession. It's the new freedom." "You know what?" replies Keith. "My career is not your problem." And with that, they both sit back in silence, and we slowly fade to white. At least David's not on the floor this time.
Aaron Sorkin: Hey! "It's the new freedom"? What's up with that? Sanctimonious liberal proclamations are my turf, and you damn well know it!
Alan Ball: Oy. I really need to buy a better lock for that door.
Aaron Sorkin: And I also don't appreciate you guys bogarting all the good weed in this town.
Alan Ball: Or maybe just a gun.
Aaron: You want me to handle this one?
Alan Ball: Be my guest.
Aaron: Okay, listen up, Sork-Boy. Deborah's too nice a girl to tell you what we really think of you here at TWoP, so I'm gonna step in and take a swing at it. You, sir, are an arrogant, self-indulgent, 'shroom-guzzling bong monkey whose delusions of literary grandeur are surpassed only by your obviously marijuana-induced inability to remember even the simplest items your fact checkers pull for you. The fact is, West Wing has steadily increased in suck since Season Two, and now that you've scored the dubious distinction of being the only show in all of recorded history to include blatant rip-offs of both Les Miserables and Chuck Norris's Delta Force IN THE SAME SCENE, I think it's safe to say that the shark has been jumped. And let me tell you, it is ALL downhill from here. Which is why everyone who knows anything about Hollywood is already counting the days until your mug-shot ends up plastered across the front page of The National Enquirer. You're the new Robert Downey Jr., buddy-boy, and the amount of time it'll take you to go from being a TV producer to a cocktail party joke can be clocked with an egg timer.